Timecop (1994)
Director: Peter Hyams
Cast: Jean-Claude Van Damme, Mia Sara, Ron Silver, Bruce McGill
Time travel has been invented — and naturally, someone's already trying to weaponize it to steal an election. Welcome to Timecop, the 1994 JCVD action sci-fi spectacle where the mullets are questionable, the CGI is deeply committed to being bad, and the concept is actually way more interesting than it has any right to be.
In this week's episode of Dewey Pod Monster, Sean and John strap in, hit 88 mph (or whatever the hell they use in this movie), and dive into one of Jean-Claude Van Damme's most enduring and most gloriously flawed films.
In this episode, we discuss:
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Same Matter, Different Problems — The movie beats you over the head with its one rule of time travel — “the same matter can't occupy the same space at the same time” — exactly five zillion times, and somehow still makes a mess of it. We break down every paradox, plot hole, and moment where the logic completely waved goodbye and walked off a cliff.
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1994 Predicted Everything (Badly) — Ron Silver's corrupt senator wants to buy the presidency using time-stolen money and the power of television. In 2004. It's played as a sinister, far-fetched scheme. We… had some feelings about how eerily close to home that lands in 2025.
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The CGI Crimes of Our Time — From the rubber-faced time-warp tunnel sequences to the absolute train wreck of Ron Silver touching Ron Silver, this movie's visual effects are a special kind of ambitious failure. We discuss what a modern reboot could do with 30 extra years of technology — and why we'd actually show up for that.
We Also Talked About:
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Body Count (1986) (Tubi)— Sean caught this Ruggero Deodato (of Cannibal Holocaust fame) Italian slasher set in an autumnal forest. Incoherent plot, Friday the 13th vibes that go completely off the rails, and a banger theme song by Claudio Simonetti that rivals Friday the 13th Part III. Charles Napier and David Hess show up. Available on Tubi if you're feeling adventurous.
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I'm Going to Be Famous (1983) (Ok.Ru) — A direct-to-video melodrama about aspiring actors gunning for their big break, featuring Dick Sargent (I Dream of Jeannie) as a theatrical director. It goes places. Specifically, it ends with a live on-air shooting and a farmer dad beaming with pride that his son is finally on TV. Sean does not heartily recommend it but cannot stop talking about it.
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Widow's Bay (Apple Tv)— A new Apple TV+ horror-comedy series starring Matthew Rhys (Perry Mason, The Americans) as the skeptical mayor of a cursed New England island. Sean is fully sold — it leans hard into the comedy and actually sticks the landing, which John argues is the only way a horror-comedy works. Eight episodes, dropping weekly.
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Electric Boogaloo: The Wild, Untold Story of Cannon Films (2014) (Youtube) — John calls this a high recommend for anyone who grew up watching late '70s and '80s action trash. A relentlessly entertaining documentary full of insane production stories, Golan and Globus being magnificently delusional, Tobe Hooper being surprisingly articulate, and more T&A than any non-pornographic documentary has any business containing. Pair with The Go-Go Boys but watch that one first.
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The Bride (2025) (Amazon) — Maggie Gyllenhaal directs this very loose Bride of Frankenstein retelling with Christian Bale and Jessie Buckley. Looks gorgeous. Both leads are great. Opens five storylines and closes exactly zero of them satisfyingly. Goth Moulin Rouge meets Bonnie and Clyde vibes. John is somewhere in the middle, but would absolutely watch a sequel.
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